I’m so vain, you probably think this blog is about me, I’m so vahahahain… Actually I am not. If I were I wouldn’t post unflattering images of myself on the interweb. But well, you are forgiven to think otherwise, after all I have shown myself here a few times recently.
No, I won’t present you handy links to all the relevant posts – and feed your suspicions of my overestimated self-importance. The point of it really is: If you are a budding photographer, you need to practice. And when you have no willing victim, never forget that you can always play practice with yourself.
The reason I am coming up with this [irony mode] gem of advice [/irony mode] is that I just found something in the deepest depth of my long buried visual diaries from 2009. It kind of pays to write those things. You wouldn’t belief how much fun I have had, reading through my bungled, f*cked up 15-year-old thoughts. And even a look back just three years into the past can provide much entertainment.
I really wish I was better at bullsh*tting. Maybe then I wouldn’t just see the hilarity in these images, but would find the eloquence and far-fetched theoretical superstructure for an artistic interpretation of what really comes down to photographic failures.
In fairness – particularly picture 2 is not bad considering that these were all taken by pinhole camera! They were all taken in the bright sunshine and I exposed pic 2 for 30 secs. No wonder I am all fuzzy. (Mind you – not that fuzzy – I am almost impressed by myself… Have you ever tried to hold still for 30 seconds? Impossible if you are not lying down or not tied to something.)
Picture 3 is all nicely artistic. I wish I had intentionally just exposed my shoulder and done away with my head (much as in real life, so to speak). It could be such a wonderful comment on the hardness of life, resting on my shoulders while my head is in the clouds – or some such nonsense. Exposure time here was 15 secs on account of the bright sunshine and a background which I calculated to be lighter. I also shook the camera a tiny bit which probably also accounts for the blurriness of the image.
As for picture 1: Again I have managed to do away with my head. (There seems to be some kind of pattern in this…) I left the shutter open for 30 secs. Again, I did get a result, but the long shutter speed means that I appear rather fuzzy in it – well, impossible not to move.
So, there. Abusing myself. At least I know how to do that properly.